Exhausted, scared, and excited…all rolled into one!

September 14, 2005 at 4:43 am Leave a comment

I am so emotionally exhausted tonight from the excitement of this day, so I won’t write too much tonight, but I wanted to share that we were chosen as the “lead” family chosen for Johnny Joe! Normally, they would have contacted our agency, let them know that our family was one of the few famiies being considered and they would send someone to represent us at the committee meeting where they choose the lead family. They didn’t do that, they went to committee without letting them know, called and said we were it, and the reason they chose us was because of our experience with my nephew Eli. Amazing.

We have gone through just a small portion of his file today, and they are sending the rest of it from Austin today and we should be reading it all on Saturday I imagine. He may have something called Angelman’s Syndrome, it is not positive, but the geneticist seems to think it is a definite possibility. I have been reading all about it this evening, Whew! It seems to also describe my nephew Eli, who is undiagnosed at this time, and says that it is usually undiagnosed until the age of three or more. My mind is swarming, with doubts and fears and hopes and excitement. I cannot begin to describe it really.

After we read his complete files we will then have to decide if we are still interested in adopting him, at this point, even though I am vacillating between terror and joy; we are.

Our agency has also called on the sibling group to see what the status is on them. We can’t accept them all, so if we find out we are one of the ones chosen for them too, probably highly unlikely, then we would be faced with a choice. I cannot imagine making that choice; them or Johnny Joe.

Dear glorious Father in Heaven, direct our steps, take away my fears, help me to meditate only on your faithfulness and loving care in all things. You have a plan that cannot be upset! I long to follow your will for our family and for Johnny Joe, I beseech you to make it clear to us Father in this crucial time of decision making. I pray for a humble spirit Father.

Proverbs 16:9
In his heart a man plans his course, but the Lord determines his steps.

Proverbs 19:21
Many are the plans in a man’s heart, but it is the Lord’s purpose that prevails.

Jeremiah 2:11
For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you, and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

It would probably be a great thing if I would remember to breathe too! :-)

Love one another~Adrienne

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Entry filed under: Journey to Joshua.

Tough call today… Another child offered…

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